Shattered and Destroyed ( Mischa )

[Ceraphine Davis]

Continued from....

Whimpering softly she would try to pull away from the people around her....her body trembling so heavily that she did not know what to do other than to jerk away every time they tried to touch her.

Finally one doctor got it in his head to use a sedative on her, only problem was, the instant she saw the needle she threw her fist up into him, the adrenaline from fear allowing her enough force to bust his nose and send him back, the needle instead being jammed into a nurse.

Oh yes, this was not going well, all the while her blood continued to soak the bed beneath her, her clothing now a solid crimson shade and her skin a pale white that nearly matched the scary shade of her eyes...........

_____________________________________________

Meanwhile outside, they had already called up her next of kin on her file, of course they knew her, she was here often enough......

As the phone rang the nurse was quick to explain what was happening as soon as Mischa answered.

"We have Ms. Katashi here at the hospital...Oh god...You better get down here."

It was all she could think to say, her stomach turning as she dropped the phone back onto the cradle and then hurried to try and help the rest of the nurses assist the doctors.....

Both fear and a need to help the poor little thing consuming her. How could somebody do this to somebody so small, and seemingly innocent........She was disgusted, and hoped only that the girl she believed to be this ones girlfriend would hurry up and arrive before it was too late to say goodbye........

[Mischa Badoer]

She had a permanent marker in her mouth as she strummed away at her guitar reading what she had written on a paper. She was getting better at writing songs... but she still wouldn't show anyone her original stuff. She heard her phone go off and she looked over at it...taking the pen out of her mouth and quickly writing down a note before picking up the phone. She didn't bother to read the caller I.D because she already let it ring for too long.

"He-"

"We have Ms. Katashi here at the hospital...Oh god...You better get down here."

The call was hung up before she could ask any questions... This is the last thing anyone would wanna hear... The nurse was even too panicked to explain what was going on. Already Mischa started to shake with fear.

She got up...dropping her guitar..yeah she heard a crack and yeah it was the only guitar she paid so much attention to to avoid any damage.... but it was simply in her way.

Her hand reached into the bowl of car keys grabbing what ever hooked into her hands first. She ran into the garage pressing the button and discovering which car she was going to take.....

--------------------

Mischa stood in the middle of the hospital... everything seemed to be chaotic... maybe it wasn't and it was all just messing up in her head... she couldn't think straight...

"Mischa?" She didn't hear the call...only stared off into the hallway were all the rooms are. "Mrs. Badoer."She turned to see a panicked nurse... "Mrs. Badoer? Ke-"

"Where the fuck is she?"

"She is in room 126, but they are still trying to contain her you ca-"

She was gone before she was told she was not allowed to see her. She ran down the hallways... They looked a lot like they were stretching as if she were in the movie "The Shining". Finally she found the room and burst in the doors. There was blood on the doctors... from their own wounds....and from Kev's. She couldn't see with a bunch of people in the way... but somehow the crimson liquid managed to stand out in the white room.

The room started to get dizzy.... she knew what was happening to her body.. it was going to shut down... she was going to faint... Mischa leaned against and empty hospital bed to try and keep composure.... She came this far to see her... she didn't want her weak stomach to get in the way.

She approached the throng of people and shoved them to the side..they were all a little confused as to why she was here... some trying to pull her away. Mischa pulled out a gun and pressed it to someone's head.

"Back off me! focus on getting her better!" she would yell... angry with their attempts at saving her Kev... her baby.

Her eyes turned to the girl on the bed as she put the gun back..... the..knife wounds...so barbaric... Had she ever seen her in this condition? No.... not this bad...

Mischa held in a whimper... though a noise escaped before she got it muffled. She held her mouth tight with her hands...trying to hold in her cries...and probably her lunch as well... Tears were already making it down her face....

Who did this?

"Baby...Baby... calm down let them fix you... let them help you."

[Ceraphine Davis]

She could not read the emotional patterns of the people around her, her mind too far gone for even that as she threw her head back into the bed and growled once more, a weak, gurgled sound as she struck yet another nurse away from her.

Then there was something.....but what it was she could not tell, it seemed to be from her past, but no telling what it was right now.

Then a familiar voice.....Wait.......was it familiar? She couldnt fucking tell!!

Tears continued to barely seep down her face as she gripped the railing of the bed only to feel her bloody hand slip against the cool metal. The sounds of that newcomer growing louder, more threatening.....Then the voice became softer, more pleading....

Her eyes shifted to see.............Mischa?

The face drew on a memory, but the memory was distorted and clouded with others that fought to take hold and shove it aside. Another soft whimper, barely able to be heard as she let her small hand reach out as best as she could manage toward the girl...Only to have it fall short and onto the blood soaked sheets....

As tears continued to seep down her face, she closed her eyes, another flood of memories taking hold and again that name escaping her lips......

"g....gabriel......."

It was all she could say before she felt a jab into her arm, her initial instinct was to throw said arm upward, managing to nail another nurse in the face and send her back....The drug having been partially injected in her however before she was able to do so.

"Do...dont let them...h....hurt me...a..anymore....."

It was nothing more than a whisper, but she spoke it beggingly toward Mischa. Words nobody would expect from Kevala, but she was no longer herself.....She was broken both inside and out......

As those white eyes turned to Mischa she would feel the drain on her body becoming too great for her to stand any longer...eyes growing heavy......her movements slowed.....

No, not the drug, but the loss of blood......slowly slipping away as the monitor on her heart began to slow, the rate dropping slowly...steadily......

[Mischa Badoer]

Mischa saw the hand come up...but only to fall.. she whimpered to see how she was... She didn't know what to take on Gabriel... He couldn't have done this... The flesh on her leg was torn... Gabriel was trusted by Kev...

Mischa's presence made the girl's focus fall on her so they were able to stick her with the needle before of course the nurse got smacked in the face... at least she still had fight in her... what was scary was WHY did she have fight in her?

"Do...dont let them...h....hurt me...a..anymore....." and something Kev would never do... ask for help... admit she was scared... Well she had admitted to being scared before to Mischa... but this was different.

"Don't worry baby I will kill who ever hurts you..."

She saw hesitation in the nurses and doctors.... obviously worried if they accidentally mess up that gun was going to be pulled on them. Mischa would kiss the hand that was not wounded before she saw Kev's eyes roll to the back of her head when she passed out from either the drug or lack of blood.. Mischa didn't know...she wasn't a doctor.

-----------------------

Mischa was laying on her side on the bed beside Kev... considering the gun and the seriousness of it all they let Mischa stay in the room. Her eyes barely blinking as she hugged a pillow tight to her stomach.

They worked on her...careful as they could be 'cause they had someone threatening watching their every move... now... everyone was out of the room except her and Kev. She remained on the bed... scared to test her legs.. she wanted to sit the the chair by her side, but she didn't have the strength... Mischa was waiting for her to wake up...if she did. "Baby....wake up..." she prayed under her breath as she wiped at the tears trailing down her temples and over her nose.

[Ceraphine Davis]

As the drugs began to wear off she would slowly start to wake up, but things were still not good in her mind, a whimper the fist sound to escape her as she jerked upon the bed, only to feel that she could barely move.

Pain ran through her body like she had never felt before, and yet she still tried. That presence next to her caught her attention then, and as she turned her eyes to see Mischa there, she did the only thing she could reasonably think of in that moment.

She gathered all her strength and turned her body over, ignoring the pain, and buried her face into Mischa's chest, curling into a tiny little ball against her and trembling.

She was terrified, scared to death to go back to that place. The memories still so fresh that had been unleashed. Her personalities all mingling and allowing the fear Katie usually held back to envelop Kev.

Her hand that was still able to be used, gripped the girls clothes as she tried to disappear against her.......Breathing heavy and shaky as she sobbed against her............

She couldnt speak, the words so mixed up with everything else in her mind, she was unable to form them in a complete thought, let alone a sentence...........

Yet every breath Mischa took Kev feared was some attempt for her to move away and that was not something Kev could handle, her grip only growing tighter.......well as tight as she could manage.......

Finally she broke a few words out........though they were strained and hard to understand.........

"wh...why did he...do this to me...?"

Another whimper and again she nuzzled her head into Mischa's chest......

[Mischa Badoer]

She heard a whimper and her interest perked with excitement she was awake. Now she was scared she was going to hurt her for being on the bed next to her... she wasn't supposed to be that's why there was a chair there.... but Mischa wanted to be as close as possible... But before she could try and correct something she thought wasn't wrong... she was held to the bed. She felt Kev's face bury into her chest and felt her small hands grab hold of her clothes. Mischa tried to hold everything she had together... tried her best not to crumble before the girl who needed comfort... It was just hard to see someone you love so much in such a state of fear and pain.

Every second she would feel the grip get tight and tighter and all Mischa could do was try and hold her in a way that wouldn't damage her stitches... She wanted to comb her hair and comfort her the way she was used too... but she had stitches there too... So all she could do was stroke her back lovingly and kiss atop her head.

"wh...why did he...do this to me...?" Mischa stiffened... her breath stopped and her small strokes seized as she heard the words. She replayed them in her head trying to make sense of it all. She mentioned Gabriel before she was put under... and now she bring ups a "he".... she had to be talking about Gabriel. What prevented her from hunting him down while she was asleep was her not knowing any facts and the fact Kev was in the hospital and needed company 'cause something obviously shook her up.

"Baby... I-I don't know..." Kev was too fragile to be talking about this.... so Mischa would follow along.... But to a certain extent. "Just try not to worry... I'm here or you..." she felt hopeless.... What was she supposed to say? Someone she cared about...did something atrocious to her... it was scarring for her....scarring for Mischa to see her so torn up.."You... can tell me everything when you're ready, babe... You don't have to now if it hurts too much... I love you and I will listen..." she would kiss atop her head once more..holding her tightly in a sense of sincerity.

[Ceraphine Davis]

Kevala felt that hand on her back, felt the kisses to the top of her head and as she tried to let those touchest sooth her, she would cry softly and continue to try and lose herself against Mischa.

"I..was hurt......G..Gabriel...t..took me somewhere..."

She grew more tense, her body seeming to react to the fear her mind now felt as she trembled all the more and let forth another heavy whimper.

"H...He left me.....this ...this thing.....did .....this to me..."

It was the best explanation she could come up with right now, the details sketchy and the pain all too real. As more pain continued to start filling her, she would feel her grip on Mischa loosen. Not because she wanted to, but because her hands were unable to hold a grip any longer.......

Slowly her hands fell away, until all she could do was remained laid there against the other girl.....Too scared to do anything and too weak to stay awake much longer........

"I...l..loved him....."

It was the last, breathless set of words she could let out before she would finally fall back to sleep.....Her eyes falling closed and the tension draining from her petite frame........

[Mischa Badoer]

Mischa was given a vague explanation.. She would want to dig deeper into it later... but she needed Kev to be more stable than this... This was the lowest of the low and when she explained Gabriel's part in it... it made her sick to know someone who you cared so much for could fuck it all up for what??

Kev's grip was weakening.... Mischa wasn't sure why, but as she felt her body loosen she could tell she was falling asleep... she just had a sudden burst of adrenalin that got her up...enough fear to make her hold onto Mischa for dear life.

"I...l..loved him....." Mischa tensed a bit. It felt like a piece of her died inside. Kev had never said those words about Gabriel. Mischa could feel them there... but it seemed a lot different when they came out of her mouth... knowing the boy had such an affect on her... Mischa felt like she failed Kev... Kevala couldn't love Mischa more than Gabriel... she fell for the wrong person.... Mischa should have tried harder... But how much harder could she get? She kept coming back... Well... coming back was an understatement... she was always there. She tried her best to chase away the monsters at night.... Tried fighting all her fears.... but Mischa couldn't protect her from deceit... from someone that should have cared.

Mischa wanted soooo much to leave and get Gabriel... But she knew it would be the end of her and she didn't want to leave Kev... She assumed Uriel was going to be the end... He would have been if Kev didn't find her... but at the time she didn't care if he was the end... but now she was with Kev... not WITH but... enough to want to stick around and keep her as safe as possible.

But now that she was asleep in her arms like how she felt everything should... she would close her own eyes. She hadn't slept yet... she had a late night and then was called into the hospital... and she couldn't sleep until she knew Kev would wake... and now she was stable.. so she could get some shut eye.

[Olivia Green]

Shu got her past everyone... Holding on to her as she was in her straight jacket... People thought she was a loony being brought into the hospital.. X had no idea what was going on... or where she was. She had never left the premises before.... They even shot her down with a hose dispersing hot water to "wash" her. The didn't remove the mask in that processes so as of now... her mask was only slightly damp and traces of her ravenous hair peaked out of the eye holes of the mask.

"I need you to go in there and stick this in her IV.... I showed you how to do it." he held up a syringe topped with a vibrant blue..... she recognized it, it was injected into her system every day. It was medicine and made her feel better... or so she was told. He would untie her from her straight jacket and send her into the room. Why was Shu doing this? He liked the progress. Felt that he was going some where... learning a new technique in destroying someone. He would kill, beat, torture... but now he found another treat... messing with the mind.

The School Captain wasn't going to be the only one he would sick X on.

X would grab the needle and before she was in the room. It was slight dark, only a small ray of light that peaked through the blinds. As she walked in a slow pace she would stop... just in a location where the light was shimmering over her eyes... making her eyes glow a brighter green than they were.

She stared down at the two bodies on the bed. Neither of them making any sense to her. She didn't know who are why she was doing this, but Shu told her to do it so she would. If one of them woke up... Her eyes would flick to them.. pressing a finger to her mouth to gesture and demand their silence. Her eyes would simply fall on the brunette... lighter hair... Nothing was recognizable with her.... but the girl beside her sparked something.. but she could not recall... aside from that... she stared at the girl she had never seen before.... Everything about X's stature.... was creepy. She just stood as still as she could...lifelessly... because in technicality she had no life.

Whether one of them wake up she was going to walk up to the IV and stick the needle in...letting the blue liquid mingle with the clear. Now that she was done... her curiosity struck a cord at the one girl. Her eyes remained on her as she approached the bed... Her hand about to reach out and touch her face until she heard the snapping of fingers. She jumped and turned to see Shu's hand peaking in through the door... he prevented her from touching the girl's face... He never minded before....

She would look over at the two one more time.. and if one was up... she would press her finger to her mouth once more before leaving the room...

"You did good."

[Ceraphine Davis]

Kevala was sleeping, it was not a restful sleep but it was a sleep none the less. Curled there against Mischa she would breath in her scent and let her body soak up that warmth.

Just then, something invaded her dreams, something familiar, something she did not like.......She shifted, whimpering softly though it only came out as breathless....

But then there was that distinct feeling that somebody was about to touch her, and her eyes shot open, just in time to see the retracting hand of that masked figure.....

Fear gripped her heart, and though she would have screamed at this point, she was unable to do so. Then, as the figure began to leave, motioning for her to be quiet, tears spilled from her eyes.....

She reached to try and wake Mischa, to try and get somebody to help her, but before she could, there it was again. That breaking down of her walls, the memories flooding back and the inability to control her own thoughts and emotions.

And finally, after all that she had been through, she screamed. Her body falling off the bed as she reached up to rip the IVs out of her arm and then push herself across the floor until she slammed into a wall.

Her small hands shot to her head, tears burning her cheeks as she shook her head and cried out.

"MAKE IT STOP!!!!"

It was all she could say as every emotion from her past, from her youth sprang to life at one time within her.....That night when her boyfriend had hurt her.........All the times people had tried to destroy her..........

Slamming her head back into the wall, she did not even feel the stitches there open up upon impact..Too lost in her own personal hell with no way out............

And again...............she screamed...............

[Mischa Badoer]

There was a scream. Mischa was on the brink of sleep...where everything was blurred and she was almost out cold... but that scream was enough to make someone shift in their grave. From the suddenness she jumped and fell off the bed... and heard a similar thud on the other side.

"MAKE IT STOP!!!!"

That voice was recognizable.... but not familiar. Mischa looked under the bed to see fresh blood soak the floor.... Kevala had opened her stitches. Mischa tried getting back to her feet but she was throwing herself forward to try and run to the other side of the bed. She stumbled until she basically crawled to the other side.... Kev's scream... Blood curdling... It was more o the fact Mischa had never heard her scream.... Maybe in a dream... but never had she actually heard that noise from Kev. It terrified her.

"Kev... Kev! Baby listen to me..." she was trying her best, but panic was apparent in her voice... she was screaming... her voice was uneven and breaking as her breath quickened. She found herself kneeling in Kevala's warm blood. Mischa placed her hands on either side of Kev's head and would steady her so she would no longer bang her head against the wall... She felt the blood slide in between her finger tips... She hand opened the stitches in the back of her head as well.

Mischa pressed her hands to her wounds trying to stop the bleeding.. but it wouldn't stop... It spilled over her hands... she couldn't render it... she couldn't save her.

"Help!" Mischa screamed at the top of her lungs. "SOMEONE HELP! I NEED A DOCTOR!" she grabbed at Kev's cheekc with her bloodied hands.... trying to steady her, but it was difficult with a shaky grasp. "I'm so sorry Kev..I'm so sorry...." she was apologizing because she didn't know how to fight this demon... she didn't know what was going on... what was able to make Kev scream?

In her mind... everything went silent... even her repeated apology was getting muffled and she couldn't understand herself... She only heard echoes... and she was pulled back... She screamed but nothing came out as Kevala was getting further and further away. She reached for her with bloody hands.... only to have her view of Kevala marred by the men in white and her own blurred vision due to tears.

Was the world ending?

[Ceraphine Davis]

Kevala felt those hands on her, her eyes trying to focus on Mischa, but the pain was so bad, the emotions so real. Tears streaked down her face as she looked at the other girl with nothing but fear and begging in her eyes....

Begging her to help, begging her to make it stop.....Even through the apologies, she begged silently........But then the men in white where there again, this time pulling Mischa away from her so that all that was left was the warm blood that had been pressed upon her face.

As she was pulled further away, she screamed and tried to push her way through them, slipping in her blood which had pooled on the floor as she tried to crawl over to where Mischa now was....

Yet there were hands on her, grabbing her, trying to stop her, and as her hair fell down into her face, sticking to the tears she continued to shed, she cried out once more.

"Mischa please!!! Make them stop! Let me die!! Please!!! Just let me die!!!"

She jerked away once more only to have a man pin her to the floor, blood soaking the front of the hospital gown she wore as they shoved another needle into her, instantly making her feel weak. A single hand reaching out only to fall to the floor and leave a bloody streak in its wake.......

As her eyes fell closed, she would whimper out one last word, her breathing slowing with each passing second........

"Please........"

[Mischa Badoer]

Both were fighting to be together.... Both struggling to hold each other in their arms... but Kevala's Next words numbed Mischa. The blood drained from her face as she saw the stick the needle in her. When she stopped moving..her eyes opened wide... some of the help tended to the bleeding girl as one nurse stayed behind... slightly waving their hand before her face.... trying to get her attention.

please...

She wanted to cry...to scream.... to lash out... and she knew she should... but right now her feeling of existing was nothing... A life without Kev was too much to bare... Kev wanted nothing to do with life... she wanted to die.... to run away from the world... run away from Mischa.

Her eyes stared at the blood smeared across the floor.... representing death.... the death of a part of Mischa.... The part that survived only on the thought of wanting Kev happy...healthy... It died... Would she be able to get it back...? Would she be happy if Kev was happy again? Will she be happy again.

Tears poured from her eyes... she couldn't feel them... She couldn't feel the lump bubbling up within her throat. She just wanted so badly to feel... she needed it. She needed it for Kev.

"Mrs. Badoer?" she heard the words...but they didn't process... She stared as the tears flowed and the pain became none existent. Her mind wondering to the gun she had in her possession.

"I...She..." Mischa tried to get words out..... finally everything hit her. "She is running away..." her body started rocking back and forth as her mouth was open...frowning... "Her life... she's running away from it... I... I'm apart of that life... I can't keep up... I'm trying... But she won't let me... She won't let me in... I want in...I'm going to keep trying... but wi-will she let me? I'm trying..trying" she grabbed at her chest... a pain so deep.. "Trying..." she would hold tightly... her breath quickening... "Don't let her die... I need to try..." she would beg as if they were going to obey Kevala's wishes. "I want her.. I need her.. I...Can't breath.." she would lay down on the floor... curled in a ball.. ass if the world couldn't get at her that way. "Please keep here alive..I can't breath.. without her."

Now all she could do was wait.

[Ceraphine Davis]

The sleep she had been forced into did nothing for her mind. Still she felt the memories of her past echoing within her like a monster storm, tearing apart everything that she had once built up in order to protect herself.

Yet the only sounds that could be heard from her were the soft moans and whimpers that indicated she was anything but peaceful. Flashes of the previous event coursing through her mind, bouncing about as she tried to put the pieces together.

That masked figure...the one who had hurt her the first time, now there at the hospital. She had done something to her again, breaking down her mind, leaving her as nothing more than some small thing curled up on the floor screaming.

Mischa........She had been there. Blood coating her hands, tears on her face. All because of Kevala, all because she had broken...Because she was unable to handle the flood of emotions she had worked so hard for so many years to lock away within the confines of her alternate personalities.

Suddenly, her eyes shot open, tears already brimming on the edge of such and threatening to fall free. As one broke away and rolled down her cheek she went to wipe it away, only to find that she was unable to move. Her hands hand been cuffed to the bed with the kind of restraints used on mental patients, keeping her pinned to the bed.

Pain still continued to course through her, obviously the doctors had worked hard to repair her damage once more. Yet, even though she knew she should have been relieved, she was instead heartbroken. She wanted to die...because this was too much. She was hurting Mischa by being the way she was, she was broken and destroyed because of everything she had gone through, she was nothing but a mess of the girl she used to be.....and above it all, she was in pain......great emotional pain......The physical she could handle, but the emotional was something she had worked for years to avoid.........

Whimpering softly as her uninjured arm jerked at the restraints, trying to pull herself free only to quickly realize that she could not.

So, instead she went to look around for Mischa, panic filling her eyes at both the thought of once more being restrained as she had been on that fucking table, and at the thought that Mischa was not there........

"M...Mischa?"

Her tone a weak cry compared to the way it usually sounded. But with all that was still turned loose upon her mind, it could not be avoided.

[Mischa Badoer]

The put her in the second bed in the room...knowing full well she would be able to afford buying the space. She was facing the wall and behind her was the bed Kevala was sleeping in. Mischa tired of watching her sleep... she kept associating it with death... imagining Kevala dead in a casket... It made her stomach turn upside down in pain... Mischa didn't like imagining such things... she felt guilty doing as much. Now she laid there with her fingers tracing the woven material of the hospital bed sheets.

"M...Mischa?"

She heard the voice... it sounded more like a cry than a question... Mischa sat up in her bed and looked over at Kev. It was dark now, the day had passed... Mischa's eyes were blood shot and held bags below them from lack of sleep and all the crying. She knew Kev couldn't move due to straps.

She didn't say a word... her throat was cracked from the use of her voice... she didn't want to show Kev what pain she was going through. That girl would blame herself in all the wrong areas.

Mischa would slide off the bed and sit in the chair that was facing Kev's bed. Silently she wrapped her fingers within Kev's good hand.... before cupping the back of the hand with both her hands...now pressing her cheek into the palm of her hand... she wanted to feel the touch of her hand...even if it wasn't by her consent.

Her head would raise from her hand and she would comforting hold it lovingly as she leaned her chin on top of the mattress... her face near Kev's head. "Are... Are you alright?" she would ask... hoping that there were no longer any more suicidal thoughts.