Going Bananas

[Guy Nottingham]

*Squawk!*

The tremulous noise coming from behind Guy in the kitchen area shifted his attention in a slow turn of his head. In his hand the banana shaked with the sudden tremors in the earth as he saw them. MONKEYS!

His eyes growing large out of fear and confusion Guy tried getting up from his perched spot but was too slow the tidal wave of monkeys rushed over him squashing him quickly as they went. His only ideal was to protect his banana.

Hands moved quickly to conceal the thing under his weight without squashing it. It seemed fairly easy considering the monkeys had to be under seventy pounds. Looking up from his hidden spot under the tables he noticed he was left outside the little ring.

Hehehehe

He may have suffered first blood but he was in the best position to retreat advance in the opposite direction.

[Ceraphine Davis]

Eyes shot to Jack in a harsh warning about his little friend, a soft growl edging her words as she turned back to this Phoenix guy.

"Such an interesting name for somebody so dull. And do forgive me, I was not thinking clearly and obviously classed this poor creature in the same species as yourself."

Then turning to get her point across to just what she had been meaning she would look at the primate and nod her head slightly.

"I am sorry. Never meant to degrade your intelligence by grouping you with this overly rude and obviously ignorant moron."

Did she care that her words were harsh? That she was being a bitch? No.......Because nobody talked to her like that. NOBODY!

Then just like that, as if to back up her previous statement the primate talked. And wouldnt you know, that out of all the things she could have done. She laughed.....Her hand coming up to cover her mouth as she shook her head and pointed at the orangutan, eyes going to Phoenix.

"See? I told you he was smarter!"

*DIES*

Though eventually she did manage to get herself under control, only to hear a stampede of sorts as the other monkeys took their position around the group, trampling over Guy in the process.

>.<

Ouch...........

Wait........Yup...........The banana was saved people! The banana was saved.......

Then, again, as though some heavenly being was for once looking out for Kev, the monkey hurled a handful of shit right at Phoenix, Jack's laughter only making her own laugh that much harder.

Finally stopping in her laughter long enough to turn to Cain who was now trapped in the circle with them.

"I have no clue, but it is getting ugly wouldn't you say? Welcome back!"

With that she was quick to duck behind Jack and hide. Yeah like she was getting dirty if she could help it.

"Any bright ideas baby? Maybe we should just give them your buddy there. They seem to like him."

Unable to hold back another burst of laughter, even as she kept her eyes peeled for anything being thrown her way.

[Kazuya Hikari]

Kazuya saw the orangutan look over the counter, a bored expression on its face as it yawned widely before reaching up with its left hand and pulling itself up while the other revealed... a top hat? You have got to be shitting me... But sure enough, it was a top hat, as the orangutan placed it on top of its head, a giddy little grin plastered on its face, as Kazuya took the chance while it was occupied to sneak up on it. But just when he thought an orangutan wearing a top hat was weird enough... it got even weirder, as Kazuya froze immediately where he was. What the... did it just talk!? And apparently it was British and very irritated, as it raised its orange haired arms and slapped its face, before pulling out a monocle and turned to face Kazuya, who was still in the same position, as he got smacked in the face. "..." First a talking British orangutan, now he got smacked up side the face. What's next, an army of monkeys?

"I'm so glad you find this hilarious Jack." Kazuya said sarcastically, as he saw the orangutan pull himself up onto the counter, the orangutan stood in an erect stance before clapping his hands like he was summoning a butler, as Kazuya heard the sound of squawking moments before a small army of monkeys came stampeding in... trampling over Guy of course. Idiot... The monkeys then cackled while encircling them, as Kazuya climbed to his feet, his cheek stinging slightly. The monkey beside the orangutan then threw a handful of poop at the guy that had been talking to Kevala, as Kazuya had to resist palming his face as he heard Jack giggle... then full out roar with laughter. "... Jack... They're not going to be pets... Especially not an orangutan who's intellect is on our level... maybe higher." Kazuya injected, as he folded his arms lightly across his chest, while watching for anything that would potentially fly his way, as he saw Kevala hide behind Jack, using him as a human shield. "My apologies for insulting you like that Mr...?"

[Cain]

Cain would look past Kevala for a moment, finding himself looking at a familiar man as he approached the... Orangutan. What? Cain raised an eyebrow in complete curiousity and confusion as he first placed his attention on the man. Was that... Kazuya? Cain furrowed his eyebrows, remembering his first meeting with him, when he had defeated Cain himself alongside Kale, using the props of the PA room. Resourceful fellow, he was. His mind would wander away soon enough, though, as he looked towards the orangutan. Now, what the hell is an orangutan doing here, in #774? However, just as Kazuya was about to capture the orangutan, it did the most weirdest thing ever, Cain's eyes and mouth gaping wide open at the view of it all.

The creature would put on a top hat, slap Kazuya to the side, before putting on a monocle. What... The... Hell? And... It talked. Cain rubbed his eyes for a moment, unsure of what to believe now. Was it a dream? Nah, the smell was enough to tell Cain that this was real. But still, a talking British orangutan? This was way too wacky.

Then, with a commanding squawk, Cain would soon hear the sound of more monkeys, as they emerged from the counters of the cafeteria, coming in and surrounding them, looking quite menacing indeed. Cain would let his teeth grind against each other, a soft grin on his face. Well, this was... Unusual. He never thought that he would be surrounded by hostile forces so soon again, and by primates, at that. And they would throw the first attack.

Let's look at this now. Cain was behind Kevala, and Kevala was beside Phoenix. Cain could easily perceive the shit to be thrown at him. How would the man react? Well, he did not know Phoenix, so Cain could care less how he would react, so Cain did what any other asshole would do. He reached forward, grabbing the back of Phoenix's collar and holding him tight there as he lowered himself, protecting himself then from the shit.

And at the last moment, Cain would let go, taking a step to the side, moving himself once more to Kevala, his eyes glancing over to Phoenix as he gave him a soft of innocent smile, his right hand reaching up to scratch the back of his head.

"Well, this isn't exactly the kind of welcoming party I had in mind."

[Phoenix]

Phoenix turned his eyes from side to side, taking in every miniscule detail of the chaotic atmosphere that was steadily growing in surrealism. Everyone seemed to be confused as to what was going on which told Phoenix that no one really knew the answer to his second question and as for his first question, well, he already knew that he was being a smartass. Almost as if Jack could hear his thoughts, he ran past whispering just what he thought of Phoenix’s question. Smirking whilst Jack ran past him, Phoenix would turn back to Kev so that she could no doubt berate him for being a smartass.

Listening to Kev’s response, Phoenix would allow the smirk on his face to grow a few centimeters.

“Dull? Considering that we’ve only spoken a few words to each other I think that's hardly fair. No need for anyone to forgiving. Just joking around after all.”

Turning back to analysing the situation in front of him he would hear a voice that he hadn’t heard before and would try to locate the source only to see no one’s lips moving except for the orangutan. A heavy British accent was heard through the air again in response to Kazuya’s (Just going to presume that Phoenix doesn’t know about Alex’s name change) call towards the animal. Not being able to believe his eyes, Phoenix would take a step forward almost subconsciously as his intellect raced through his head. All Phoenix’s thoughts were concentrated on how this occurrence could exist. Genetic engineering? No, England wasn't up to such an advanced stage yet. Freak occurrence of nature? No, there was no way that it could occur. Nonetheless, this orangutan could speak English and obviously possessed enough intellectual capacity to be offended and deserved to be treated with a little respect.

Unable to clear his thoughts in time, Phoenix sensed the flying globule of faeces approaching his face at a frightening speed to late. Resigned to the fate of having monkey face being spread across his person, Phoenix would close his eyes. Feeling a sharp wrench downwards on his collar, Phoenix allowed himself to be brought down to the ground and watched with horror as the faeces barely missed his face and continued on its path to collide with the wall. Picking himself up he would turn around quickly to see who, or what, had aided him in avoiding the faeces. Seeing an unfamiliar face, Phoenix would simply nod his thanks before turning back around.

Jack’s loud voice thundered through the cafeteria just as soon as his laughter subsided at Phoenix’s almost realised fate. Stepping aside to allow Kevala to walk past him and basically assume a position that utilised Jack as a meat shield. Smirking, Phoenix wondered if Jack knew that she was using him in such a fashion.

Deciding that answering Jack’s loud question was a waste of time, Phoenix would walk forward until he was in a position level Jack. As Kazuya provided an appropriate answer to Jack’s question a moment later, Phoenix would listen closely and even chuckle when he heard Kazuya mention that the ape in front of them might possess a higher intellect than himself and Jack. Knowing that an ape could never be smarter than himself, Phoenix would allow Kazuya to continue speaking as he took the correct path and addressed the orangutan as an equal.

[Jayr Byrne]

British Pirate Monkeys from space?

"I say! Young lady watch your mouth!"

Jayr would cock her head back swiftly as though taken entirely off guard, yeah talking monkeys tended to do that to a person better affiliated with talking humans despite their own idiocy. Jayr would settle to place hands on her hips in a defiant fashion as she stared down the monkey, the thing taking its time to get suited before she'd even realized that the group was surrounded and the first attacks being flung devilishly.

"Oh My God....Ewww." She said without any restraint to her girlified tone.

She lurched back defensively backing up within Dean's grasp without much other attention to anything else in the world her stare heavily set on the monkeys armed with their poop missiles.

"Please don't let them hit me, please no please no." Turning around she'd bury her head in his shoulder keeping a steady eye defensively on the approaching army of Primates.

[Jack]

theme

In response to Kevala's look Jack just flashed her a cheeky grin, clearly showing that he was indeed enjoying himself and wasn’t fazed at all by Phoenix’s rudeness. "Such an interesting name for somebody so dull. And do forgive me, I was not thinking clearly and obviously classed this poor creature in the same species as yourself." Pwnt. Jack would contain his building chuckle, Kevala had just torn Phoenix a new arse hole and fuck me it was hilarious.

No one had really spoken to Phoenix like this, it would be a good learning curve for the younger one, there are just some people you can’t be a dick head to, doing so will just get you bashed. That prospect alone would be enough o prevent you from fucking with Kevala, however she was not one who would be out smarted easily, nor would she let herself be defeated so easily. She was after all the school captain for that specific reason.

"I am sorry. Never meant to degrade your intelligence by grouping you with this overly rude and obviously ignorant moron."

LLLLOOOOOOOOOOLLLLL

"Shit's getting intense aye?"

"I'm so glad you find this hilarious Jack."

"I'm glad you and I are on the same page Kaz. this just makes our relationship all the easier. Would it be inappropriate of me to say that, the red in your cheeks brings out the colour in your eyes. Or that the prospect of shit being smeared all over your leather clothing makes this whole scenario look like something out of a gimp bondage porno. "

Jack would roar with laughter.

"... Jack... They're not going to be pets... Especially not an orangutan who's intellect is on our level... maybe higher."

“The smarter the pet the better it is, infact if they’re smarter than me then they can do my homework while I cook and clean, it’s perfect don’t you agree Phoenix?.” After addressing Phoenix Jack would turn to Kevala “Like the good housewife I am” Chuckling again as he noticed her darting behind him, that cheeky grin on her face. The one she showed the world whenever she was doing anything of a naughty nature. Jack would spin on the spot, crouching so he were on or close to equal par with Kevala.

"Any bright ideas baby? Maybe we should just give them your buddy there. They seem to like him."

“I don’t know about bright ideas, but I think I have to agree with you. Guy is the perfect sacrifice, see I’m too big and ugly so they won’t like me, and Alex is too serious. You well I can’t have you leaving me now can I? But Guy he’s so lovable he’d be able to win them all over and save the day. I think he needs to be promoted and some kind of award be handed out annually in his name and honour”

Jack would burst into laughter again as he crawled under a table, finding it extremely uncomfortable and crammed.

[The Horsemen]

And then suddenly the wall of Monkeys boarded a space vessel that took them to planet nargua a planet infested with all assortments of beaded jewels to which the monekys fed on returning with magical powers to speak and control powers of super human intelligence tehy named one another ridiculous movie and cartoon knock-offs such as Mojo-Jojo, and Simos the guardian of space and time (Planet of the Apes refrence anyone?). With their advanced power cells the Monkey army known only as the Primates marched forward to consumed worlds with their tentacles.....okay enough of this.

"Let's not chase them, can we keep them PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!?!?!?!"

Evidently enough Bananas had escaped captivity for one reason and one reason only. To rule the world! Like hell he was going back. The orangutan made a bellowing hoot in reply to his attempts to cage them if even that meant being a mascot or plaything. These idiots were clearly underdeveloped.

Bananas turned about using his left hand to scruff up his little orange beard before looking at the metalic surfaces, so maybe he was underdeveloped physically standing at about half of their heights yes this was true but with the simian advances he'd clearly outmatch them.

"See? I told you he was smarter!"

"Dank, young lady." He'd tip a hat to the one who'd been giving out all the orders from the beginning.

"My apologies for insulting you like that Mr...?"

"Bananas....Mr. Ba-Nah-Nah's" He'd pronounce it slowly so the lesser life forms could understand it clearly, he needed to speak slow for a goot number of them he could tell with their glazed over expressions. Its like they'd never seen a talking Orangutan before.

"Sacrifice? My my..." Bananas would scruffle his beard again giving the big one a good long stare, "You're species truly is primative..."

Bananas would speak with a serious influction not finding this at all humerous, no he was much more atuned to his homelands humor. Thats when the monkey hoard trampled Guy. Bananas would be floored, his bum on the counter as he applauded roughly enjoying they stupid boy's ass getting crushed and that he still strove to protect the banana beneath him.

"HAHAHAHAHHA!" The chuckle echoing in the halls.

Composing himself quickly Bananas would adjust his monacle and straighten an invisible tie about his collar scruffing up the hairs at his chest before making a large bellow.

Instantaniously the monkeys encircling the group would get into attack positions. All of them were enclosed aside from Guy so the circle would get very tight as Monkey #1 grew angry....very angry and reloaded his special cannon.

"Chika!" It'd shout thrusting its hand filled with poo at Kevala quickly. #2-3 would do the same although their targets would be at Jack and Cain. #4 would hurtle atop the pain of Jayr and Dean, its toes poking Dean in the eyes while its hands would tug at Jayr's hair causing a certainly bad hair day.

#5 would grow bored approach Kazuya slowly and then sit down in front of him waiting staring up at him through puppy dog eyes awaiting him to come close before the monkey would fire its index and middle finger into the boys eyes completely by surprise.

[Cain]

And Cain would acknowledge the gratitude from Phoenix, knowing full well how messed up it would be to get hit by one of those projectiles. Now, here was the deal. Kevala was behind Jack, and Cain was to Kevala's side. It was at that moment that his foot stepped on something that stuck up, with Cain's weight being on one side of it. His attention caught momentarily, he would glance downwards, realising then that he was standing upon a tray. He looked up once more, as the orangutan proceeded to introduce itself. Mr. Bananas? How... Fitting. Cain could not help but droop his shoulders in awkward uneasiness. How... [=_=;]

As Jack and Kevala started a somewhat unusual conversation, Cain would once more look around at the monkeys that surrounded them, their group of seven - Jack, Kevala, Alex, Phoenix, Dean, Jayr and himself. Knowing what they were capable of, Cain wanted to make sure that he would not get hit here. The day just started. There was no way Cain was going to get himself dirty. Not this way.

Then, suddenly, the ring of monkeys went somewhat berserk as they charged towards them, one of them specifically going towards Cain from the front. The Junior's eyes widened as he saw what the creature held in his hand. Oh, shit, no... Literally.

Cain would quickly stoop down and pick up the tray, holding the lower end of the longer sides in his hands, before quickly getting back up and placing the tray in front of him, like a shield, as he intended to use it to block and repel the projectile. Yes, as soon as he felt contact on it, he would push back, hoping to get the monkey back on the ground.

Gah, this was so not the kind of brawl that Cain thought he would be in.

[Ceraphine Davis]

Kevala shook her head at Jacks words. No she wasnt going to sacrifice anyone...Except maybe Phoenix....cause he............was an ass....But other than that she held no ill will toward anyone.

Her eyes shooting to Jayr, she would shake her head as the girl seemed to try and use her girliness to save her.....Brow perking as she noted the guy she had seen once before...At least she thought it was him.......She honestly could not be sure.

Instantly she was a bit curious, though for the time being, with her shield hiding under a table now, she would yelp in surprise at being suddenly exposed.

O_____O

SHEILD!!! She needed a sheild!

*grabby hands*

The instant the little furry bastard tried to peg her with shit......srsly........she would shoot her hand out, grabbing Phoenix and tugging him in front of her with what force she needed to accomplish it.

*WIN*

IF for some reason he didn't move, which was highly unlikely given her strength, then she would instead duck out of the way, letting it sail past her and right onto the table where Jack was hiding...

EWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!

>_______<

Wrinkling her nose she would drop her shield and instead look about the immediate area before grinning and hopping from the ground to the table, to another table, to the floor where she slid under a third table to find herself huddling next to Guy....

"Save the banana huh? Good work......Dont know what I would have done if the poor banana had gotten taken out in all this....."

*HAPPY DANCE* ( Okay so more of a happy butt wiggle...but you get the picture )

She giggled then, shrugging her shoulders as she turned her attention back to the group.

"I think we are outnumbered.....Don't you?"

Another little giggle, clearly having way too much fun, as she tried to think seriously on the matter at hand. Finally she would peek out and find Mr. Banana's and smile.

"Excuse me Sir....What is it you exactly want here?

She was being polite, sweet and straight forward......best she could do......Always primed to make sure she did not get hit with anything............nasty......cause that would just be icky!!

>_____<

[Kazuya Hikari]

Kazuya heard the orangutan let out a bellowing hoot in response to Jack's plea to Kevala to let them keep it as a pet, as he saw the orangutan scruff his beard up and peer down at the metal counter, then thank Kevala and tip its hat at her before introducing itself. "Figures..." Kazuya groaned, as he saw the orangutan scruff his beard up once more, giving Jack a long look as Jack turned around and face Kevala, crouching down so his face was on level with hers. "... I think she's referring to Phoenix, Jack..." Kazuya muttered under his breath, it was pretty clear the orangutan didn't find Jack's suggestion funny at all. Resisting the urge to palm his own face as he heard the orangutan roar with laughter at Guy being trampled, he quickly composed himself as the monkeys encircled them, trapping them as shit flew... literally. Kazuya heard Jayr express her opinion in the most eloquent way possible. "Oh My God....Ewww." Kazuya was thankful he wasn't able to smell it, his mouth and nose covered by his bandanna, making him appear like a wild west bandit. All he needed was the cowboy hat, and he would be set.

"I could say the same to you too Jack," Kazuya retorted, smirking slightly as he heard Jack roar with laughter, "The brown would match lovingly with your white jacket and bring out the color in your eyes." He saw Jack crawl under a table, leaving Kevala exposed, as he heard her yelp in surprise and grab Phoenix, dragging him in front of her as the monkeys charged, all but two hurtling poop at everyone else except for Kazuya, Jayr, and the big guy whose shoulder Jayr had buried her face into. Carefully watching the monkey that approached him, looking bored, it stared up at him with puppy dog eyes as it plopped down in front of him, as Kazuya stared back at it before his eyes flared in surprise as it fired its index and middle finger at his eyes... only to collide with Kazuya's glasses. "..." His hand darting out, Kazuya grabbed the monkey's wrist and shot straight up, yanking the monkey up with him, hopefully making it dizzy from getting up so quickly, before tossing it straight across the cafeteria as he turned one of the tables onto it's side and tried to wrench the monkey attacking Jayr off her and plopping it down off to the side, attempting to grab her wrist and pull her behind the table as he plopped down beside her. "... I ain't gonna be made a monkey out of..."

[Jayr Byrne]

Hands to yourself!

Jayr would feel the texture of the guys jacket and felt the slightest bit safer feeling the fact that she wasn't under assault from the monkey's flinging poop about, quite honestly this had to be the most disgusting thing she'd ever seen at this school not to mention ever. As the fuming heaps of poop and the overall scent of the room began to become overtly intoxicating she gripped tighter pulling up at the hems of the jacket before a quick and harsh jerk on her hair pulled her face out of its safe embrace.

"Ahh!" She'd shout unconsciously as the monkey pulled at her harshly causing the boy she'd gripped onto just as much trouble. Hands would come up trying to sever the grip without her hair being split, loose ends were no light matter and she wouldn't let this monkey ruin her hair. Tough as she may have been beauty was still significant.

A quick jerk at her wrist as Jayr was pulled away behind a few tables. By this point she was annoyed and fiery, what was she a rag doll to be trounced about.

"... I ain't gonna be made a monkey out of..."

*Crack*

Her hand would come across Kazuya's face harshly and unrestrained. Yeah she was getting just about fed up with being treated like some china vase, she was fragile but not to the extent people were taking her too.

"No but I'm seconds away from making a bitch out of you if you don't stay away from me!" Cheeks flushed and eyes welling up a few instances away from tears. Her hands would ball up tightly ready to break loose as the fact that an army of sapiens were bouncing about in the cafeteria wreaking havoc.

[The Horsemen]

OOC: Going to try and wrap this up before July is over so we can get a move on, if you're left behind I'll assume Auto-hits Muwhahaha.

Mr. Bananas watched through cleverly insinuating spectacles, though he could only generally see through one and his depth perception being poor he chose not to move but rather remain balancing on the metal island at the edge of the cafeteria wavering his fingers before himself as if he were orchestrating the entire assault.

As Monkey #1 Smiled devilishly over his dung bomb cascading into Phoenix's face he'd proceed to charge manically forward towards the boy taking the ample time that the feces would have impaired his vision or distracted him to get right beneath him punching the boy's in the nuts. To which if successful Bananas would burst out laughing falling from his standing position. Monkey #2 would do the exact same for Jack although being far crueler than his predecessor he'd climb up the trunks that were Jack's legs up to his neck quickly giving the boy a wet willy.

# 3 Would be sorely disappointed as his poo was deflected. Angrily pouting he'd look up at Bananas with a childish whimper before sitting at the floor and cross his arms.

#4 would be yanked from his perch and be sent flying towards where Kevala and Guy now sat curled up the monkey pausing long enough to scratch his head and stare at Guy quickly realizing his intentions. The Banana! The monkey would lunge at Guy harshly trying to strip him of the banana.

#5 was the stupid one and tried a foolhardy move however where stupidity was persistence preceded. Quickly galloping over the tables he'd pursue where Kazuya had escaped to, as his back was turned the Monkey would leap finding his hand knotted in Kazuya's hair while the other peeled away at his sunglass forcefully trying to yank them away.

"Excuse me Sir....What is it you exactly want here?"

"ALL YOUR BANANAS ARE BELONGING TO US NOW!"

[Guy Nottingham]

Guy was tackled on many multitudes, finding himself crushed beneath the immense weight of the tiny monkeys, okay maybe it was a bit of an exaggeration but they had very painful feet that no doubt were covered in some sort of fesses or mud which Guy would hope for over the prior.

"Save the banana huh? Good work......Dont know what I would have done if the poor banana had gotten taken out in all this....."

Guy looked up at Kevala who he wasn't sure if she was joking with him through sarcasm or genuinely serious about all this. He cocked his head like the monkey's who had just trampled him forming a contemplative smile as if he was playing along too if she was being serious than he'd won if not hopefully she'd fall over laughing at him and forget the beatings.

Then she giggled again with a sort of wiggle, okay now he was really confused. Looking down at the banana he considered just bolting now that he had his prize, lingering about would only cause further problems for him.

"I think we are outnumbered.....Don't you?"

"Uhhhhm..." Guy would come to a stand slowly retreating with his back to the wall inching closer with the banana in hand a look of sleuth to his figure.

"ALL YOUR BANANAS ARE BELONGING TO US NOW!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"

Like a mad child Guy would bolt around the corner making for his own escape.

[Jack]

Jack was ready to make his move, he was already sick of this shit, he was a warrior not some pet shop owner. Fuck this and fuck anyone who wants me here, I'm not paid enough to have ti deal with this shit! I don't even get paid!. Jack would growl as he looked on ahead, his mind furious with the outcome. Why did this always happen to him?!?!?!?!?!

Jack's eyes located the monkey running toward him, he was fast shit! what do I do! GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY MORON! It was a straight forward attack, nothing he couldn't handle. Jack would stand up lifting the table as he tipped it forward, attacking as a wall between he and the monkey. Getting distance between them Jack would spin around and sprint for the other table, planting two hands onto it he would vault over the table and then turn around.

"Come on you fucking ape!"

Jack would call out as he push kicked the table forward aiming for it to slam into the monkey as it landed. He would continue to retreat back louring the monkey into his territory, for now having the upper hand until he ran out of tables to use.

"TAKE THAT!"

Jack prepared for the next push kick, his large muscles firing up getting ready for combat.