Decent Into Darkness ( Invite Only )

[Ceraphine Davis]

( ooc: Okay so this is a thread in which things may get a tad bit confusing....it is going to be most likely JUST Kev throught its entirety though it may not appear as such at times...Just....if you read it...TRY and keep up.....Heh )

~~~~~Tuesday February 26 8:25 A.M~~~~~

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I[/size]t had been a long, and very sleepless night for Kevala. She had tried to sleep, honestly she had, but the news she had gotten the evening before had been enough to keep her mind working to the point that all she was able to do was toss and turn. A never ending struggle to try and get comfortable, when in the end, the comfort she needed was not physical, but mental.

She was leaving. She was going to be packing her things and driving away. She was going to leave Kevala here, alone, with just the voices that filled her mind and an empty house. Normally the twins would be there, but given Kevala's current mental state, it had been decided last night, that they would be staying with their Nanny until she returned......

Who is this she you might be asking?

Mischa of course....

The one person on this earth, who held Kev together. Who gave her a reason to keep fighting when the idea of quitting seemed so easy.

It was a business trip.....only for a little while.....she would be back soon enough......it could not be avoided...

But it was not just any business trip...she was going to Venice....as in...out of the country...as in.....too far away for Kevala's comfort..

Not that she was comfortable with Mischa being a couple hours away for a long period of time....but yeah....still!

Either way, there was nothing that Kev could do about it. Not that she had not tried......in fact, she had tried everything...from getting mad...which did not work at all..cause it just upset Mischa and then made Kev feel bad and then ended with them both in bed and just ....yeah......

So, then she had tried the pouting routine...which usually always worked...cause Kev was cute when she pouted..which she did often when she did not get her way.....spoiled as Mischa had made her.......

But again.....it did not work........which was shocking to Kev, but she knew that it had made Mischa feel bad...again........

Then she tried reasoning....( funny how she always worked backward with her methods...) with the girl...But it had failed as well.........

So, now here she sat.....pouting.....upset, tired as all hell, looking a mess and watching as that car pulled out of the drive.......

She had of course gotten a reassurance that it would not be for too long, and a very long kiss good bye..a couple tears and a hug...not to mention a million I love yous and I will call you every nights.....but honestly....it was just not enough for Kev.....

Already she could hear the sounds of the clock in the entry way echoing through the entire house....a loud ticking sound that was enough to drive her insane....or at least more so than she already was.......

Her icy hues, red around the edges from lack of sleep and crying shifted toward the television hanging on the wall......then to the gaming consoles they had set up there.....

But no....she would only think of how much she loved playing those games with Mischa......so then to the movies.....and again..the same problem......

She whimpered loudly....even though nobody was around to hear it....Sighing heavily she pushed herself out of the chair that sat by the window and made her way up the stairs......deciding that maybe she should just lay down now and stay there until Mischa came home.......

Though she knew she couldnt....she still thought it.....

Either way she laid down in bed........curling up with Mischa's pillow and breathing in the lingering scent she loved so much.......Already feeling those tears begin to fill her eyes....It was the first time since they had been together that Mischa had left....and to a mentally unstable Kevala, it was like she had been abandoned...even though she knew better......

Yet, as she lay there, her eye lids becoming heavy and tears soaking into the pillow she had gripped tightly to her.....she could not help but feel that something was coming....that when Mischa had walked out the door...it was the last time Kev would ever see her...............

A dark laugh sounding in the back of her mind at the thought, just as the heavy blanket of sleep started to take hold....sending a chill down Kev's spine as darkness took hold and once more.....the dreams started to consume her mind.........

[Ceraphine Davis]

(ooc: I found myself disappointed with my own thread, so I am going to be working on fixing it. So bare with me. )

~~~~~Wednesday~~~~~

It had been only a single day since Mischa had left, and already Kev felt the need to drink, to silence the voices of the other two in her mind....The battle that was constantly fought between her and Sasha for control was shifting....or at least the power was.....Kev had already blacked out twice, and though she tried to remember what had happened, she could not.

Whimpering softly, she made her way out of the shower, her head in constant pain as she wrapped a towel about herself and reached up, pushing back her damp locks from her face, she reached out, clearing the fog from the mirror to look at herself....

What she saw, scared her.......Her eyes, were no longer their icy blue shade, but instead a mixture of both blue and red.....The signs of her struggle clear on her face.....dark circles under her eyes, a tired, almost defeated look in her eyes.....It was enough to make her look away.....

She could not stand to look at herself.....she knew what was coming and it would not be pleasant. Stumbling out of the bathroom, she grabbed a bottle of tylenol and unscrewed the lid, downing 5 of them without even going to get something to drink.

She knew it would not help, for there was very few things that could subdue the pain she felt in her mind on a regular basis now. Dropping the now closed bottle onto the table she made her way to the bed, sitting down upon the edge of such and eyes falling to the bottom drawer which she always kept locked....

Her small hand reaching into the spot she hid the key and then opening the drawer.....inside, a bottle of whiskey she had kept hidden from Mischa......Opening the top, she breathed in that heavenly scent.

To some it would appear that she liked to drink. But the fact of the matter was, she hated it....the taste, the feel, everything, but when it was the only thing you could find to silence the ones in your mind.....It became something you savored as much as the air you breathed.........

The tip of the bottle brought to her lips, she got just a taste of the liquor which remained upon the rim, feeling that tingle on her lips where it touched......A deep breath taken as she closed her eyes.........

Then an image flashed through her mind....The site of Mischa, at the hospital, that pained look on her face....the one that Kevala had put there......

Growling at herself, she jerked the bottle away from her lips and screamed, throwing it across the room and watching at it shattered upon the wall, the brown fluid slowly running down toward the floor as Kev fell over onto the bed, her hands gripping her head.......

Dark laughter echoing within her mind......

Give up! You know you are not strong enough to fight me. Not anymore....You are alone...You are nothing...pathetic.....Just let go.....

Please....stop this....I do not wish to fight but I do not wish to see you two like this. Let her be Sasha...please....

"SHUT UP!!!"[/color]

Her own voice echoing off the walls of the room as she closed her eyes........tears burning at the back of her eyelids.........Gods help her.........For nobody else would.......

[Ceraphine Davis]

~~~~~Thursday~~~~~

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Honestly, she could not understand how the other one kept up this fight. What was it that drove her to stand against the rising force of Sahsa? That girl? Those kids?

In her mind, it made no sense. It was some emotion, something that everyone around her, or around Kev at least, deemed as love. Gods knew she had heard that word so many times within her life, that she was sick of it.

If for no other reason than she could not understand nor comprehend what it meant.

The only emotions that she knew, were rage, and hatred, and a primal, near animalistic desire burning within her......

She wanted to taste life, to know what it was like to be the one running the show, to be the one in control, and she would...She would make sure that by the time it was all said and done, she was the one in control and Kev was nothing more than a memory.

But it of course would not be that simple...Had it been during their time in Long Beach, at that blasted school 259, she would never have been able to accomplish it. Too many people there to support Kev and to beat her back whenever she tried to take hold....

But not here, there was only one......one annoying and very problematic pain in her ass.......

Mischa.......

But that seemed to have solved itself......and given her an opening.....Even as she stood there, before the mirror, drawing the razor against her arm so that she could satisfy that hunger that burned deep in her stomach....she projected thoughts into Kevala subconcious.....Let the little thing dream.....let her see what was really behind her precious Mischa leaving......

The rain fell heavily on the ground outside as Kevala waited patiently for a call from Mischa......Biting her lip nervously as she looked out the window, she checked her phone once more.....Still nothing.....

It was two hours past the time when Mischa usually called, and it had Kev worried...unable to wait any longer. Dialing Mischa's cell, she waited patiently for an answer.......Only to hear the sound of a male voice come onto the other end..........

"Hello?"

For a moment she was too shocked to even move let alone speak.....Something had happened to Mischa.....it had to have.......but then, in the background she heard that sleepy little tone she knew all too well......

"Who is it?

"I don't know..Wont say anything."

"Then just hang up and come back to bed....."

Then the line went dead....he had hung up...She thought.....But she was unsure, for in that moment her grip on her own phone had been lost as it fell the floor, breaking apart as it it the tiled floor, the back coming off, the battery falling out and sliding under the nearby couch......

Before she even knew what was happening, tears were felt streaming down her face......Her knees weakened, and the next thing she knew, she was on the floor.......A voice, coming out of nowhere seemingly filling the room......

You see....? She did not leave for business...she left for a man. You know her Father wishes that of her. Why would she turn her back on her family for you? A girl who is losing her mind. You are nothing but trouble. She wants more than that...

She wanted to deny it, to scream out and say that it was not true...but combined with what she had just heard........It had to be........Shaking her head, she would lay down upon the cold tiled floor, curling up and crying as she trembled there.....

As the blood filled her mouth, she shot a look at herself in the mirror...Yes, this was working out perfectly.....More so than she could have imagined......Just a bit longer, that was all it would take....Just a little bit more.........Patience......all a matter of patience......,

[Ceraphine Davis]

~~~~~??~~~~~

It had been days? Weeks? She had honestly lost track, the days and nights had been lost to her, now, it was just a never ending cycle of nightmares, and blackouts......or were they nightmares? She could not tell anymore.....

It was just so tiresome....now, when she looked in the mirror, her eyes no longer held any blue..but more a dull shade of red, with the blue mixed in...It was, unique unto itself and intoxicating to look upon, but Kevala knew what that meant......Sitting upon the floor of their room...The room she shared with Mischa....The woman whom she loved more than anything in this world.....tears flowed from her face....

"Are you ready?"

She shook her head, her entire form tremblng as the words came from her lips, but were not her own.........Why did she ask? Why did she even give Kevala a chance to reply?

because she is toying with me......

Whimpering softly, Kevala looked down at her hands, hands which clasped tightly to a picture she had taken of Mischa and the twins.....It was back in Long Beach, at the park.....

She remembered that day....remembered the happiness she felt in her heart at the sight of them playing together....they loved Mischa, and she loved them......Sure, the had met Kasturi, but he had left them again......Perhaps for the best......But to them...Mischa was mommy and that was the way Kevala wanted it........A single tear fell upon the frame as she traced her finger over the figure of Mischa.....

The thought of never seeing her again, tore her apart inside, but this was the end, she knew that....she had nothing left to give, and her mind had convinced her, that perhaps her dreams were not that at all......Mischa had moved on......She had finally found somebody that would make her happy and who her family could accept her for....

It was more than Kev could ever have hoped for the girl....Yet there was a voice, a soft, gentle tone that kept telling her to not give up hope on Mischa...that it was all lies.....And no matter how much she wished to listen to that voice, she could not.....

"Not yet...let me see her...just one more time...Please...."

Her tone was weak, barely a whisper, though why she spoke out loud to the one who was only in her mind, she did not know....nor did she question...the house was filled with a sense of madness, her own, and it had consumed her to the point she could not fight any longer.....

"I will not allow that...And you know it....Just, let go. Make it easier on everyone....Or we can do this the hard way. Either way, you know the outcome."

She trembled as those words left her lips, biting her lower lip as the tears continued to flow down her face....Finally she nodded, drawing in a deep breath as she waited.....for the darkness to take hold one last time.....But then, something came over her mind...a light.....of sorts.....Katie?

I cannot stop this, I see that now, but allow yourself time to say goodbye to her.......I shall keep Sasha at bay for now......Though you must hurry......

Kevala....was stunned yet at the same time found herself crawling to the dresser to take out a piece of stationary and a pen......She had to say goodbye....it was only right.....

Mischa....My Love....The woman who showed me that not everyone turns when faced with love......I am sorry baby...I am sorry that I was not stronger....Sorry that I could not stick around long enough to see your beautiful face one last time....That I was not strong enough, to hold out for one more touch....

Perhaps you have found another.....somebody that will keep you happy and make your family proud of you....Something I could never give you....Though please....take care of the twins...They love you so much...and I know you love them.......

I may have done a lot of things when you return, that you can never forgive, but know that it was not me..never me......I remained yours up until the end....and even now as the end is upon me...I know that I will continue to be yours.......Please stay away from Sasha...I cannot stand the thought of seeing you hurt....Just please...take care.....and remember.....That I will always and forever love you.......

Love Eternally~
Kevala <3

She looked over the letter, one last time, and then, folding it, she placed it into an envelope.....Writing Mischa's name on it and then sighing softly.....

"You will see that she gets it?"

Yes

With that, Kevala opened the copy of Wurthering Heights that she had bought Mischa, and slipped the letter inside....Placing the book back where it belonged.....

"Okay.....I am ready...."

And with that.........the light faded, and darkness again took hold, and in that instant Kevala, was gone.......

"Now, time to have some fun."

That evil little smirk curling on her lips as she pushed herself up to stand and throwing the picture she had in her hands down to the floor where she heard it shatter. Though she did not look back, no feelings to drive her to do so...No, she had a few matters she had to take care of...

She was after all, going to have to pull off being sweet little Kevala's sister.......But a few changes would have to be made....Hahaha....

She had won.......and though she did not really feel anything but the anger that filled her, she could not help but laugh.....