It Wasn't Me!! (Mischa)

[Ceraphine Davis]

I[/size]t was 3 a.m and Kev was JUST getting home...Probably not the best thing in the world since she knew how much Mischa hated it when she stayed out late without calling....

But if that was not bad enough, she was not exactly walking all that straight either....she was drunk...for the first time since Long Beach....The nightmares had come back, and she felt like she was losing herself to them...Something was wrong but she did not know what and she did not know how to explain it to her girlfriend.....

She loved Mischa more than anything in this world...and that night she had accidentally pulled her into her dream had been Kev's breaking point...She had started drinking again soon after that, but just a little here and there...

Until tonight....Tonight she had woken up from a nap and another horrible dream...this time the details so sickening that it made her stomach turn....she had gone looking for Mischa only to find that she had yet to come home...So she had figured....One drink...down at the bar across town......And that one had turned into many and now......yeah...she was struggling to get her key into the lock....

Finally managing to do so, she slipped inside..trying not to make too much noise as she moved to shut the door and then drop her keys onto the table in the entryway....

Only they made a loud thud as they hit the ground.....WTF!?

Then it dawned on her that she had gotten rid of that table the day Mischa had tripped and ran into it, cutting her leg....Yeah....just another lost piece of furniture that Mischa had run into..A little obsession of Kevs...

Wincing she bent down to pick up the keys, only to fall onto her ass and end up leaning back against the wall with a light groan...Yeah...maybe she should just stay here instead of waking Mischa...probably for the best.......

[Mischa Badoer]

Mischa was bloody worried over Kevala. Why? The girl was getting stressed over the nightmares. If Mischa was able to catch all the bad habits of Kevala right away when they first started seeing each other...what made her think Mischa wouldn't notice now.

Right now Kevala was out and it was three in the morning. No call. That could only mean one thing. Mischa wanted to read Wuthering Heights, but the lamp wouldn't be able to be used due to the fact there was no longer a bloody nightstand was missing. That and she couldn't focus on a novel. Then she heard the loud thud downstairs.

She was home.

Mischa got up and would run out their bedroom door, though slowing down so she wouldn't trip on the rug that was just outside the roo-

WTF where is the rug!?

She walked down the stairs and saw Kevala on the floor near the missing table....

Mischa sighed and walked over to the fallen drunken and crouched down.

"Where were you?" Mischa looked around the foyer and back to her girlfriend, "And where is coat rack?" her voice wasn't scolding, but it was soft. She wanted to make it sound like she wasn't in trouble and as if she was leveling with the drunk girl. It was never good to yell at someone drunk.

[Ceraphine Davis]

S[/size]he had just closed her eyes, finding herself drifting off into a somewhat peaceful sleep when she heard the sound of footsteps....and then the sudden surge of confused and worried emotions.....

FUUUUUU........

Mischa was up.....and she was on her way down the stairs......

Kev's eyes opened just as her girlfriend made her way to her, those icy hues flashing from crimson, to black, and then back again to blue as she sat there...Her own emotional state all out of whack at the moment and making it hard to control herself.......

Then that soft voice filled her ears, and though it was never good to yell at a drunk person....it was really never good to talk to one either when they knew they had done something wrong......

Biting her lower lip, and trying not to think of how pretty Mischa looked right now....she would lower her eyes as she shrugged slightly.....

"A...bar......maybe..."

Her tone soft and yet very slurred....as she reached in her pocket and pulled out a little napkin with a heart drawn on it along with flowers, and all sorts of pretty little designs.......Kev was an artist after all..............Handing out to Mischa she would give her a druken and sheepish little smile......

"I ma...de yous somefing...."

Yeah...Kev was sooooo wasted at the moment.....But she was trying......Right? Heh....

Now the question of the missing coat rack.......um....well.......

"It ran away?"

She giggled at her own little joke as she laid her head back against the wall and let her hand fall to the floor beside her...Not bothering to give a straight answer cause she knew where it would lead....

Kev was paranoid anyways....add to that a clumsy girlfriend she loved with all her heart and what did you get?

Missing furniture....A LOT of missing furniture....

[Mischa Badoer]

"A...bar......maybe..."

Mischa sighed at the answer, but then her attention was brought to the little napkin Kev pulled out of her pocket. Mischa took it and looked at the little pictures drawn on it with a small smile. She knew she was in trouble that's why she had made this....

God she is adorable...

"It ran away?"

Adorable...but I have to focus on the problem...

"I'm not mad...You can tell me the truth." Mischa said as if talking to one of the twins. She was slightly irritated... only because all the money they had been spending on furniture and toys for the kid was being wasted...because someone had been hiding them.

She would put her hands to Kevala's underarms to help pick her up off the ground. She was heavy, but anything was heavy for Mischa... that and picking up a drunk person was like picking up dead wait.

"Get off the floor Kev..I didn't mop it today....and it is very dirty..." when Mischa had gotten Kev up, she would wrap her arm around her waist and get Kev's arm to wrap around her neck and lean on her shoulders. She would then walk her to the kitchen and sit her down in one of the chairs.. which at the point surprised Mischa they were still here. After that, Mischa would grab a glass of water and a slice of bread and place them on the table in front of Kevala.

"Drink you need to be hydrated... and eat that..It was suck up all the alcohol..." Mischa would sit on the chair nearest to Kevala and wait. "Now...where is all the furniture?"

[Ceraphine Davis]

The way that Mischa looked at her with those worried and loving eyes was enough to make Kev's heart breark.....Feeling herself hoisted up and then set down she let out a soft sigh.....Listening intently to every word that rolled off of those beautiful lips she would again lower her eyes...Trying to hide the fast changes of her eyes.....She did not know how to say this....

Did not want to hurt Mischa....She loved her so very much.........

The sight of food and drink made her stomach turn...and normally, Kev would have said no way in hell and pushed it away, but instead she had lowered her head a bit more and did as Mischa wished....Biting her tongue she would take down what was offered and then place her hands on her lap....

"I.....sold it all...."

Not wishing to be in more trouble than she was about to be....and she knew it....Just yeah......She had something wrong with her, she could not talk to Mischa about and now this.....just yeah.......

[Mischa Badoer]

Mischa felt bad for bombarding her with all these questions.. but it made no sense as to why everything was missing. Mischa would be able to run around the house without getting her unless she tripped on her own foot.. that meant the place was absolutely empty and she wanted to know why!

"I.....sold it all...."

And that doesn't make sense. Why would she do that? They bought it together and they both agreed on all the furniture so it wasn't like she just didn't like it.. there was obviously something behind the madness of the missing rugs..

"Um...Kev? Why?"

What else was she supposed to ask? Her furniture was missing and her common law was the cause for some effed up reason. "I don't see why you would do that... I thought you liked them... unless you lied when we went shopping for them... But you know it wouldn't have hurt my feelings if you weren't a fan of the upholstery on the couch..."

She would wait for the explanation made by the girl. If anything she would get the answer. For some reason Kevala always told her the truth.. that and when someone was drunk they usually tell the truth more than they would when they are sober.

[Ceraphine Davis]

S[/size]he felt the confusion in the air continue to rise...continue to grow heavier as Mischa continued with the questions. Her hands going to her lap she fidgetted her fingers about themselves as she looked down at them....Her black hair falling into her face as she shrugged softly and muttered......

"Cause you...kept hurting yourself...."

THERE! She had said it.....Every time Mischa had stubbed a toe, bit her head, or tripped and fell, Kev had waited til she was out and had sold the pesky furniture that had caused the trouble.....

If Mischa ever went into the back bedroom where all the extra blankets were stored she would notice that the closet door she had slammed her finger in last week was also missing........

Kev just could not help it.....Every time Mischa got hurt it scared her....to death........The only room that remained untouched was her studio......or at least what used to be her studio......though Mischa still believed it was.......the door always remained locked...and Kev had been up to something.......Sneaky as she was........

"I am sorry baby...I just.....every time you get hurt....."

She shook her head....turning away from Mischa as she ran her fingers through her hair and then rested her head in her hand....She did not know how to explain it...she did not know how to tell the woman she loved that the very thought of losing her was something she could not bare........

Unless........

Shimmering icy hues turned back to Mischa as a sobering thought entered her mind.......

"Come with me...."

She stood up, stumbling to regain her footing as she grabbed Mischa's hand and tugged her along toward the back room of the house.....what Mischa believed to be her studio.......Stopping at the door as she turned to look at her girlfriend.....

"I have.....a surprise....for you and then I promise....I will explain everything...."

She smiled, those eyes lighting up with the childlike excitement that nobody....EVER had seen from Kev....was she.......nervous? hopeful? ......excited? Kev NEVER got really excited and anxious...it was just not Kevala.......

But for now she waited.....Making sure Mischa was not too mad at her to go along with what she was up to.........

[Mischa Badoer]

"I am sorry baby...I just.....every time you get hurt.....
Mischa's eyebrows perked at the sentence. Kevala would get rid of anything that would cause her harm?! Man, if that was the case she was surprised Kevala hadn't pinned her down on a bed and removed her own two feet.

"Kevala... I'm always going to get hurt. I've been this klutzy all my life...I'm still here aren't I? Pretty good for nearly nineteen years I might add..."

The girl looked away and Mischa sat staring at her girlfriend waiting for some form of reply. She felt bad for making the drunk girl feel ashamed, but it was kind of a serious matter... there furniture was missing. At least now she knew why.

Then a sudden burst of energy erupted from Kev that even made Mischa jump a little.

Next thing she knew she was getting dragged along by Kev and they were outside her studio. Mischa smiled at the way Kevala was acting. It wasn't everyday the girl was this excited. In some way.... it worried Mischa.

"I have.....a surprise....for you and then I promise....I will explain everything...."

Mischa's eyes shifted to the studio door and back at Kevala. Her brows furrowed, but in a joking matter as Mischa chuckled.

"What? More heart-covered napkins?" she joked. After she said it she nodded as if to give Kevala the go to show her the surprise. She was pretty excited to see the mystery. Kevala must have been working on something that she was really pumped over. Mischa never really had the chance to go into the studio to look at her work. The damn thing was always locked.

Now as she waited..it made her more fidgety.. "Come on..I'm getting nervous..." only because Kevala had a sudden burst of energy she probably had never witnessed...

[Ceraphine Davis]

K[/size]ev smiled, brightly at that, turning around to unlock the door as she pushed it open and then turned and hurried behind Mischa to place her hands over the girl's eyes.....

She would then lead her into the room...Not stopping until they were in the center of the room....

"Okay....now stay put and keep your eyes closed....."

She would then turn away from Mischa and hurry toward one of the storage bins in against the wall....Opening it up and pulling out a small wooden box she had carved herself.....Complete with Mischa's name on it and other unique and beautiful intricate designs....

Biting her lip she then moved to take a seat on a small, soft cubed foot rest she had put directly before Mischa......

Drawing in a deep breath she held the box out of view for now...it was the last of the surprise......

"Okay baby...open...."

When Mischa opened her eyes, she would be greeted with a beautiful room...Full of furniture that was safe to trip into and fall against.......in Kev's mind...Mischa proof....for the most part.......

But also along the largest wall of the room...were beautiful photos of Mischa....The kids.....Kev......all seperate and some of them together.......Along the other wall....Painted in elegant lettering with beautiful hand drawn paintings of all four of them...were the words....'My Family....Forever...'

It was not much...but it was something Kev had poured her entire heart and soul into for months.......ever since they had moved here.........And then with that, letting Mischa take it all in....she would hold out the box to her........

"This is your room baby....I dont need any stupid studio to capture what I really love.....I already have it all......I get rid of the furniture because the thought of losing you.....Of not having you in my life for even one moment scares me to death....I would rather die a thousand horrible deaths than live one minute without your smile..without your touch..........

Her eyes misted over slightly as she the box trembled within her small hands.......Opening it to reveal a beautiful diamond ring to her....,

"I need you Mischa Badoer....Forever.....as my lover, my friend, my partner.....my wife........"

She drew in a deep breath...having never been so scared in her life.....

"I..If..y..you will have me as yours...."

Gods she wanted to hide...wanted to crawl under their bed and stay there forever....but instead she looked up to Mischa....and waited....for what seemed like the longest moment of her entire life........

[Mischa Badoer]

Kevala covered her eyes and lead her in the room. When she was told to stop and to not open her eyes..only made her more -ancy. She heard some shuffling going on around her and finally she heard Kev settling in front of her.

"Okay baby...open...."

Mischa opened her eyes to the level she expected Kevala to be standing at... though Since Kev was sitting Mischa got a good view of the area around her. There was furniture filling the room and if it wasn't different than the stuff before she would have thought this was the place where everything was hidden.. though it wasn't the same. They all seemed very...comfy.

Then on the wall was a bunch of photos. Mischa smiled at the realization of the contents of said photo. It was her, Kev, and the kids. Some were of separate pictures of each individual and there were a few Mischa thought were not flattering of herself... but they way they were put together made her heart sink into its beauty. Her eyes then shifted to the mural painted by what looked to be Kev's hand. Mischa wanted to cry at the beauty of it... but for some reason was too shocked and was still soaking it all in.

Mischa then looked down to Kev when she started to speak and she was sitting beneath her holding a box with Mischa's name carved in it........a box.

Kay... Mischa didn't want to assume anything, but just the thought was enough to make pause in the Italian girl.

Then once the heart-filled speech seemed complete...Kev opened the box and it sparked Mischa's small flames of assumption into a large fire of truth.

"I need you Mischa Badoer....Forever.....as my lover, my friend, my partner.....my wife........I..If..y..you will have me as yours...."

Mischa stared down at the box. She opened her mouth to speak only to close it again from a loss of words. Mischa looked up to all the photos of the family and it only made her feel more emotional. Kevala wanted to share her family with Mischa... she wanted Mischa to be her family. All this time Mischa considered the twins and Kev to be apart of hers... but this.. this made it official. She looked back at Kev now with eyes watering. Mischa was a pussy and everyone can tell.. the girl cried in Underworld: Rise of the Lychans when it came out.. if she cried during a vampire action movie... of course she was going to cry when the one she loved proposed to her in a very romantic way.

Mischa leaned down on her and would wiggle herself in between Kev's legs as she looked up into her eyes. If it wasn't for the ring and the extravagant room she would have thought Kevala proposed to her because she was drunk...

Now with a little whimper that seemed almost as if she was letting out a breathy laugh she hugged Kevala, burying her face into her stomach, due to the fact Kevala was at a higher level from sitting on a cube... Lifting her head from the embrace she looked back up into Kev's ice blue eyes while Mischa still had tears streaming down her face. "Yes..I want you to be mine." she said wrapping her hand at the nape of Kevala's neck to bring her face down to level with Mischa's so she could kiss the hell out of her.

[Ceraphine Davis]

Y[/size]es, Kev knew all too well how emotional Mischa could be...She could feel said emotions like a shockwave hitting her every time the girl got upset.....It was partly why Kev did everything in her power to make sure that Mischa was nothing but happy...All the time....But of course she could only do so much.....

As she watched Mischa look about the room, she held her breath...the silence was maddening...So instead she read through the emotions....Every single one making her heart race....

She was happy.....

She was really happy!

Then Mischa was on the floor, her face buried against Kev's stomach as she wrapped her arms about her.....Eyes finally coming up to meet with her own.....

Then those words..words she was never happier to hear in her entire life.....Her own tear slowly sliding down her face just before she returned that kiss, her hand resting at that back of Mischa's head to hold her to her as she whimpered out softly into it...

She was so happy.....to klnow that the woman that she loved was willing to spend her life with her....

Pulling free, she pressed her forehead to Mischa's as her tumb came up to wipe away tear from the girl's face........

"I love you baby....With all my heart.....Forever and always...."

Soft whispered words as she moved to slip the ring out of the box and onto Mischa's ring finger......Just before again pressing her lips to the other girls...Kissing her passionately and with every bit of love she felt in her heart......

[Mischa Badoer]

Mischa let Kevala slide the ring on before aiming for another kiss. Mischa slid her thumb across the ring's band as she kissed Kevala. She could get used to the feeling. She would push Kev so she would fall back on another cube, only to tip it over and be lying on her back playfully.

"I love you too..." she said giving her one last kiss before calming down.

Mischa would rest her head on Kevala's chest. Her focus would be set on the pounding of the girl's heart as she hugged the girl beneath her. It was a happy moment and she didn't want it to end... but there was still a problem that has yet to be solve. Kevala had come home intoxicated. Normally one wouldn't care thinking it was just a harmless night of fun, but Mischa knew better with Kev. She always had a problem, but it wouldn't ignite until there was something that initiated the binge drinking. There was something happening with Kev below the surface... and now as her Fiance.. she was going to have to help, because she loved her and didn't want to see her hurt.

"I don't want rain on this parade... but... Why are you drunk? I mean...Why have you been drinking again?" Mischa's head would lift from her chest and stare straight into Kevala's eyes... the eyes that flashed different colours moments before the proposal... or in the dream.

Think Mischa didn't notice? Of course she noticed...

Mischa's hand would stroke Kevala's hair as she would lean forward to have her mouth near Kev's ear. "You know you can tell me anything."

[Ceraphine Davis]

K[/size]ev laughed as she felt herself pushed back and then fallen onto the floor...Not moving as Mischa laid her head against her chest...

Instead she would simply lay there, looking up at the ceiling and thinking over the fact that she was for the first time in her life.....truly happy.....

Then Mischa spoke, and Kev could again feel the emotions coming from the girl shift.....she closed her eyes, knowing full and well what was to come as the words slipped past Mischa's lips....Then she moved, causing Kev to open her eyes and look into those of the woman she loved.....

She knew Mischa saw much more than she let on, but Kev tried so hard to protect her from it all....from everything that was wrong with Kevala......but as she leaned in, those words whispered against her ear and that hand stroking her hair....Kev was weakened.....

She could not deny the woman atop her....no matter how much her mind willed it....In the end...her heart always won out and she gave in.....only wishing to do whatever it took to make Mischa happy.....

She knew she could tell her anything.....she trusted her fiance with her life.......and it was not because of trust that she had kept so much to herself...it was out of worry for Mischa......

But that was something she could not do any longer....

"I am...losing myself baby......The voices....they are growing louder, and louder.....sometimes I can barely hear myself through all the noise...."

She would then let her hand fall so that she could rest it against the other girls cheek, using just a light bit of force to lift her head upward so that Kev could look into her eyes once more.....

"I think....they are going to push me until.....Until the me...that you have right now.....is gone.....Until Kevala is dead...."

She spoke softly....but her next words were nothing more than a whisper as she tried to remain strong....She did not want to say this...did not want to hurt Mischa in any way.......but she had to be honest.....They could not be together if they could not be honest with one another.....

"You...are losing me baby..."

She could feel herself slipping away...bit by bit...she had been fighting it for years.....and it just kept getting worse.....but she wanted to have every bit of happiness she could with Mischa before it happened.......To give her everything she deserved and so much more.....

[Mischa Badoer]

"I think....they are going to push me until.....Until the me...that you have right now.....is gone.....Until Kevala is dead...."Mischa was given pause as she stared at the one beside her. The voices were back... How could Mischa be so stupid?! She heard the damn things in the dream... the eye colour.. the drinking. Mischa should have been able to figure this all out.

"You...are losing me baby..."

She should have figured it out before it was too late...was it too late? Mischa stared into her eyes... she felt useless...broken. All those things Kev said to Mischa. How she didn't know what she would do with Mischa being around. Had that not dawned on Kevala that was the same situation for Mischa? Yeah she was sure it wasn't Kev's fault... but shouldn't she had given Mischa some warning. Not like it will be the happiest day if Kevala succumbed to the voices.

Mischa shook her head as if telling the voices "no". Her lower lip trembled slightly. She needed to stop the voices... she wanted her Kev. "No..we can stop it..Can we? What If I get you some help? Baby, I want to help you... I don't know what I will do if..if you aren't you anymore..." call her selfish, but Mischa had just got Kev... she didn't want to lose her. "I don't want you to go..." her eye brows perked as if to tell Kev silently if there was a way to try harder...she should do it. "Stay..." she said before burying her face into her neck to hide the fact she was about to cry... though knowing Kev the girl could probably tell...

[Ceraphine Davis]

I[/size]t took all she had not to break down...to stay strong as that lower lip came forth...as those pleading words met her ears......She felt the pain, the sadness, the fear......all coming from Mischa....and inside it killed Kev...She would do anything to take those feelings away...But she could not regret telling her....she had to....It was the only way...If she had not..what would happen if Mischa woke up to find the woman beside her something evil....darker......

No...Kev would not let that happen......

Then as that face was buried against her neck, her hand came up, brushing lovingly through those silken strands and breathing in the girl's scent with every intake of breath.......Stay.....such a simple demand....but for Kev it was anything but.....

"Do not think....for one minute...that I ever want to leave you baby...You are my heart...my soul...and every part of me that is good.....You are my life...and without you I would rather die....."

She sighed, closing her eyes as she wrapped her free arm about Mischa and held her closely to her.....Feeling her warmth, her touch.....letting it sooth her in a way no other ever could...

"I fight still....only for you......If it were not for you and the twins I would have given up a long time ago.....I just dont know how to stop them....How to keep going.....It hurts so badly...all the time now....and I am so scared of losing myself around you...I fear what they may do to you....."

It had crossed her mind a time or two to leave....to let Mischa and the twins be free of her madness and to make sure that they were safe......But she was selfish and could not bare the thought of being without them........So she stayed......